


Personal Moment 2

by Seffrine



Series: Personal Moment [2]
Category: Person of Interest (TV)
Genre: A little angst, M/M, S2E10, S2E11, bitter sweet, filling the scene in between, s2e13
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-12-31
Updated: 2018-08-04
Packaged: 2019-02-24 15:44:23
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 4,073
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13216920
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Seffrine/pseuds/Seffrine
Summary: Some episodes from Season 2 that i lovethese are my version of how it goes...my plans are:S2E10S2E11S2E13there may be some changes





	1. By his side

**Author's Note:**

> S2E10 the library scene where they were discussing about Abby's plan  
> Harold POV

“Why is she doing this?” Harold turned his upper body to face John who was now standing right behind him, checking the computer screen for the details of the bank. “For Shayn?” Harold added on, with a slightness of confusion.

Abby’s previous working history with the military charity, Home For Our Returning Heroes, was an obvious sign of how she tried to honour her brother who had sacrificed himself for his country. But what she’s doing now, what she’s planning right now was like she had abandoned her brother, which was a mystery to Harold.

Losing someone beloved was devastating, soul-crushing even, Harold understood the feelings very well. His vision was once been covered in red, fuel of anger that drove him to plan on something he had no idea he was capable of, revenge. He was sitting in the wheelchair, holding the device that could take away the life of Alicia Corvin.

But he was stopped, stopped by the system which both he and Nathan had entrusted it to the government. The system he had created to protect the people was then used by the government to kill his best friend, along with other innocent lives.

The irony.

It still hurt to think about the past, but then he felt some pressure on his shoulder. It was John, looking at him with an unreadable expression.

Harold knew the look. As a former CIA operative, John was good at keeping his face straight at any moment, but there were times when John would show his emotion, silently.

Harold nodded, ensuring the man in the suit he’s fine and John answered to the question Harold had a few seconds ago.

“Yes, And for her brother. She still feels a debt.” John’s sentence trailed off, and he continued with a deeper voice, “The dead have a power like that, as you know.”

Silence filled the library. They were staring at each other while their minds had been occupied with the past memories, the memories of losing the one they loved.

Through the fine fabrics of the tailored suit, Harold could feel the warmth on his shoulder. He couldn’t stop thinking about the fact that he was the culprit of John’s life being torn apart. Because of him, John was sent to Ordos by the agency, which was why John couldn’t make it in time for Jessica.

There’s lots of, lots of blood, innocent blood on his hand, even though he didn’t kill them directly, but the people were dead because of him.

While Harold was fallen into the deep remorse, a fluffy ball was being pushed into his hand. He looked down and saw Bear, trying his best to cheer him up with his favourite toy.

“Thank you, Bear.” Harold smiled. He could still remember the first time they met, Bear being very energetic, looking for his own adventure in the library. When he saw Bear was 'playing' with his precious book collections, he wasn't sure why John had brought the dog back to their sanctuary. But when John showed his skill by commanding Bear to sit still, Harold was once amazed by John, the man seem to know everything.

The things he had done, there’s nothing he could do to fix it, but now, he found his second chance, his way to redeem the bad things he’d done.

John always says that he gave him his second chance, to be on time and save the people who needed help, or to stop people from doing bad things.

For Harold, John was his second chance, without John, he could never be able to make it this far. 

He had John by his side now, a man who could always bring hope to him. John was the light of his shadow-like life.

“So, how are they going to do this?” Harold’s tone was light and once again, filled with hope because he knew that he wasn’t alone anymore.

Harold looked up, and there’s John, standing right behind him.

He’s not alone, not anymore.


	2. Confession

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> S2E10  
> John confessed about his feeling.....toward the job  
> yeah but we all know thats not all, right

“You're in a good mood, Mr. Reese.”

Sensing the confusing tone from Finch’s comment, John couldn’t help but chuckled, “I am.”

It’s rare to see such a brilliant man being confused, especially someone like Finch, a man who didn’t care about anything else except for his little experiment. At least that’s what Finch had been trying very hard to act like, John thought to himself.

“I woke up this morning and felt,” John stopped in the middle of the sentence while waiting for Finch to catch up with him, “it took me a while to put my finger on it, but I felt happy.” He turned his head around and looked into Finch who was now following right behind him, “must be this job.” 

Standing so close to Finch, John could smell the light hint of Finch’s cologne, the familiar scent that always makes him feel calm and safe.

And you. John added silently.

There was an unusual atmosphere between the two of them but Finch finally broke it and replied, “Well, I’m glad.” 

John could sense there’s something more to Finch’s simple reply but the man always likes to keep the secrets to himself, so John decided to let the conversation go, as well as keeping his mouth shut before he spilt out something to break the current relationship he had with Harold.

John’s gaze was following Harold’s movements while following him behind, both of them heading to the secret exit of the library.

John purposely slow down his steps, allowing Finch to lead the way. After everything he had been through, John thought that was all, decided that it was the end. That’s why when he started to work with Finch, he tried so hard to read through Finch, to understand Finch. It didn’t make sense to him, because as a normal civilian, how can someone living under such anonymity, while having all these recourses.

And then John learnt about Finch’s past and he realized that Finch had a strong soul, so much stronger than himself. 

That’s when John made a decision, to help Finch to make this world a safer place, and to protect Finch from the people who were after him.

So yes, he was happy. Because he was once again given a purpose, and he was ready to stand in between everything that could take The Purpose away from him.

・ ・・・・・

“John!” Through the earpiece, John sensed a hint of Finch’s worried. “John, can you hear me? Shayn and Abby are safe.”

John wanted to answer, but Chapple’s thugs could hear him, so he kept his mouth shut, eyes moving around, trying to look for those bastards.

“FBI are in the bank. Get out now. ” 

At the same moment, John heard someone whispering in a low voice. “John, can you hear me? You must get out now.”

Yes, I can. 

John replied silently, calculating the possibility of his chance of getting away from the situation. He looked up to the hole that they blew up, following Abby’s step to meet with Harold, but denied it because he couldn’t risk exposing their mission, not especially it would probably expose Harold’s identity.

The footsteps were getting closer, and finally, John realized his chance was gone. “I'm not gonna make it, Harold.” John swallowed hard, trying to suppress his feeling, “Sorry I screwed up.” He took out the phone from his pocket, placed it on the floor carefully, “But I meant what I said yesterday.  
So, thanks, Harold.”

“It was fun.”

“JOHN!”

Harold, I… “…”

John took out the earpiece before he could say anything. He smashed the devices with the gun and threw it away afterwards.

Standing up, John stared right up from the basement, knowing he would never see him again, John headed toward the noises.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> there's so much more that i wanted to say but failed  
> this episode was the second time John said goodbye to Harold  
> and its so heart broken


	3. Apart

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> S2E11  
> John said that he'd never been jailed in the US before  
> there's always a first time for everything

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you my friend N for the Beta reading   
> Feel kinda bad because she flew all the way to here to enjoy her holiday but ended up helping me to correct my work ORZ   
> ごめんな、そしてありがとう❤️

John stared at the orange jumpsuit that was being handed over to him. Orange wasn't agreeing with him, he knew it and he had always hated that colour. He was more like the black and white suit fellow, looking like a perfectly harmless passer by, help him to merge into all sort of occasions, allowing him to observe from the far. John blinked once, twice, the eye-hurting orange jumpsuit was still right in front of him.

He had pushed things too far and got himself caught. Back when he was working with the CIA, John was the quiet type. He used to share his doubt with Kara at first, trying to sort things right, because the main reason for him joining the company was protecting people, do the right things. Not long after that, he came to the realization that asking questions was totally pointless. In the big picture, he was just a disposable pawn. That’s when he started to keep his mouth shut, following the orders without asking anything else, just trying to get things done. 

Years later, they were assigned to a mission in New York, looking for a supposed traitor of the government, Daniel Casey. While hunting down Casey, John suspected that he was being framed, by who he wasn’t sure, but John decided to let Casey go. As an ex-ranger, John faced life and death situation every day, and from there he learned that people were willing to do whatever it takes to stay alive. But from his observation, Casey didn’t look like someone who had sold his country. Who would ask for help from the government if said someone had sold some classified information that he allegedly had stolen it from the government? No one would be that stupid. So John had decided to confront Casey alone, while Kara was busying cleaning up the mess of the people who were targeting Casey made.

He warned Casey not to come back to the state, for his own safety, and of course for John’s too. At the end, he wasn’t sure whether he did the right thing or not, but he finally had a good night sleep in years.

Seeing Abby and Shayn had reminded him of his past, a man who was trying to right what had been wronged. John’s eyes were blinded by the fact that many veterans had been suffering under Chapple and his greedy associates’ tricks. That’s why he couldn’t leave Abby and Shayn alone.

But John should know better, he should listen to Finch, let Finch handle it.

Silently sighing inside his mind, John took that suit and changed. He then followed the officer to a private cell. The officer unlocked the cell in silence, nodded his head and stepped aside, allowing John to enter. John walked into the cell and turned around, holding up his hands so that the officer could remove the handcuffs.

After the officer left, John walked toward the bed and sat on it. 

He should have listened to Finch, but his pride had taken over his mind and he'd declined the kind man’s offer. After working for Finch for a year, he was still adapting to the fact that there was someone backing him up now; that he wasn’t alone anymore.

John sighed again.

He really should…

When John was still buried under his mistake, he felt something underneath the blanket vibrate. He reached under it and found a cell phone. He raised his head up and checked his surroundings before turning his back towards the corridor and answering the phone. 

“How did I know the federal government would be no match for you?” 

John couldn’t hide the warm feeling that started to spread through his heart. After working for Harold for a year, the man could still surprise him in the most unexpected situation. How could he, for a minute, underestimate the man? 

“As I suspect, it might be compromising for you to be found with a phone, I'll be brief.” Listening to the familiar tone calmed John’s mind. He missed this; having Harold’s voice echoing into his ear, leading and showing John his next step. “The matter is in hand, John. We'll get you out of there.”

Hearing Harold say the word ‘we’, John clenched his fist. 

“I took too many risks. It's my fault.” 

No one should be risking anything to get him out of here. 

“I'll handle it,” John said. 

Surrendering himself to the FBI was to keep Harold away from them in the first place, there’s no way he would let Harold…

“Listen to me. I made preparations for a scenario like this.” Harold voice cut off John’s train of thought. “In 72 hours, you will walk free.”

“……” John did the calculating himself, too. He knew that the FBI didn’t have enough to hold him up for long, as long as he could keep his story straight.

“What if another number comes up?” John asked, trying to distract Harold with something more important.

“Unfortunately, as I told you, they never stop coming.” Harold’s sigh was loud enough to pass through the cell. “I'll have to manage as best I can," he added.

John wanted to say something, but nothing came out from his mouth. He should be out there, helping Harold with the number, instead of being locked up in this shit hole.

After a short while, John knew that he should end the conversation, but he couldn’t. This may be the last chance…

“I sincerely hope our next conversation is under better circumstances. I'll be in touch.”

Before John could say anything, the phone call was ended.

Staring at the phone in his hand, John wasn’t sure that he wasn’t dreaming. Was it really Harold?


	4. Always

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> S2E13  
> Roof top scene  
> mainly John's POV
> 
> I tried
> 
> anyway  
> feel free to point out my grammar mistakes  
> and  
> always  
> thanks for reading...

He thought this was all, this was the end.

Standing in front of the door that would bring him to the rooftop, John felt all the pressure that he had been carrying around him since Stanton drag him out from the crashed car, had finally leave him alone.

This was it, the last moment of his life, and he always thought would it will be in much worse situation.

Stinky dark isolated room, broken steel chair, chain on the hands and legs, interrogation. Pain, sweat, blood, countless broken bones, inner bleeding.

Its time. He knew he didn’t have much left anyway.

John reached out, turned the doorknob and stepped onto the clear rooftop, embracing his last moment all alone.

```````

“So, I see I’m not too late.”

He was suppose to be alone up here. 

Even though it was dark, John would never mistaken the familiar and smoothing voice.

“I should have known you’d turn up here.” 

Harold being here was the last thing he wanted for his final plan, and seeing Harold standing in front of him, wearing the tailored three-piece-suit as usual, John was feeling both frustrated and calm at the same time.

“I told you to stay clear.” 

Being able to see Harold for the last time, it somehow ease John’s nerve. But this was selfish of him, there’s no way after he decided to risk everything he had but at the end, failed to protect the people he valued the most.

“Which is how I knew you’d put yourself in a situation like this, Mr Reese.”

Being the smart one as always, John’s plan was crystal clear to Harold.

One more minute, John silently indulging himself for being able to spent his last moment with Harold, but he knew this was it. He needed to stop it.

“Stay where you are.” 

Seeing Harold actually stopped, John reached into his pocket and get the hard drive out, place it on the ground.

“Here.”

Knowing this was the last chance he had with Harold, John tried very hard to suppress his feelings that was now burning hot in his heart. He didn’t deserve this precious being. This is something he could never have. Especially a confession in this moment would only hurt Harold more than necessary. 

John stepped backwards, staring at Harold, hoping his last moment would be filled with the memories he had with him.

“Find out what’s on that hard drive and stop it.”

This was how John would like Harold to remember him, the partner who tried to save the world till the last second of his life.

This was it. It’s time.

John turned around and left, trying to be away from Harold so he would never got hurt.

“Will you just let me…”

John turned around, pointing his gun at Harold. His expression was filled with pain and regrets.

The silence filled in between the two men, Harold looked down at the gun, and looking up back to John. 

“What are you gonna do? Shoot me?” 

Both of them knew that John would never do anything to hurt Harold, they both knew but one of them didn’t know the reason why.

John took in a deep breath and said,”This is my past caught up with me. It doesn’t concern you.”

“But this moment does.”

Harold continued right after. “I’m not leaving you here, John. So can we please stop wasting time?”

Seeing the determination on Harold’s expression, John knew that there’s no way he could talk Harold out of this so he finally lowered down his gun.

Knowing that there’s no much time left, Harold quickly limped toward John. He carefully unbuttoned John’s shirt and revealed the bomb that attached to John.

”Well, let’s see what we’ve got here.”

John hold his breath when Harold stopped in front of him and unbuttoned his shirt, hope this would stopped his heart bumping too fast. 

“Have you ever defused a bomb vest before?”

John said, trying to lighten the tense atmosphere.

“Can’t say I have.” Harold answered, both eyes were still focusing on the bomb. “But I believe I grasp the basic principles.”

“Well, that’s encouraging.”

Up until the last moment of his life, John still find the fact that it was possible that Harold had read every book in the world was kind of cute.

This big book nerd. 

Harold should be in the Library. It was his safe-heaven and it was John’s duty to make sure that Harold should be as far away as possible as the action was taking place.

It’s his fault.

He was supposed to be a disposal tool.

“……”

The ache in his started to form and it almost broke him, but John bit his tongue so hard that the psychical pain made the emotional ache faded a little. Just a little. 

Right before the moment John tried to open his mouth to say something he would regret, Harold made a comment on the bomb.

“It appears that she’s wired the phone to a capacitor-based trigger. If the phone is called, it will charge the capacitor which will, in turn, charge in a single…”

Seeing how Harold was rushing the words out of his tongue, John knew Finch was nervous.

“Finch.”

John almost reached out and held Finch’s hand to calm down the shorter man, but at the end, his conscious won and he lowered his hand and hid it behind his back just in case he tried for a second time.

“I’m sorry. This is my process.”

“Can you shut off the timer?”

“I cant get at the battery. I need to hack the phone’s lock code.”

“Can you do it?”

“I have built some of the most complex computer system in existence.”

Whenever Finch talked about the machine, there’s always some mixture of both proud and sadness in his eyes. But this time, he was all matter-of-fact kind of seriousness. 

“I can certainly unlock a phone.”

Finch failed to hide the excitement of breaking the code, he looked up and stared right into John’s eyes. 

Seeing Finch being Finch again, John couldn’t help but smiled a little.

“All phone have an universal unlock code based on their model and the unique IMEI number.” 

Finch looked down once again at the bomb that still attached on John, being all serious, he started to type the codes with a super speed on his mobile phone.

Few seconds later, Finch’s phone beeped, announcing his success. “Okay. For this phone, It’s one of five combinations.”

“Well, that’s good.” 

Hope started to form in John’s mind but it was quickly gone when Finch continued his sentence.

“The problem is we only get three attempts before the phone permanently locks us out.”

“That’s not.”

They both stared at each other, knowing they have no other choices but to only face it and wished for the best of luck.

John nodded silently.

Finch took a deep breath and typed in the first combination on his screen.

The time tickling mobile phone made an annoying noise, telling both the men it was the wrong code.

“I take it that one didn’t do it.”

As usual, John tried to lighten the mood around them but Finch gave him a sharp look.

“Sorry.”

Finch looked down again at his phone, decided to go with the list and typed in the second combination but the mobile phone once again, made that annoying noise, reminding they lost another chance.

The tension was unbearable, they were down to one last chance.

John took a deep breath, letting Finch’s cologne filled his mind. 

This was it.

This was the end, and he had been preparing for this for quite some time. He knew he was ready.

But now, knowing that Finch would be with him till the end…

He’s one selfish bastard.

One final chance.

Finch couldn’t decide which one to choose. He kept looking back and forth between his phone and the other one attached on John.

The pressure of making the wrong choice. The pressure of deciding for someone’s life.

John understood Finch’s struggles at the moment, but there’s nothing he could do but one; reassuring that no matter the result, John would always be fine with it.

He was supposed to be dead if it wasn’t for Finch. For all he knew, his purpose, everything that kept him going, it was all because of Finch.

Finch was his purpose, his life.

Being able to spent the last moment of his dark grey life that filled with lots of blood and guilts, with the only person that actually meant something to him, it was worth it.

John never believed in some higher power. He believed that everything that happened was because of human being human. 

But this moment, this moment right now, John thanked for whatever it was that bring Finch to his side.

Let him be selfish for the one last time. Let him have Finch all to himself for the rest of his life.

“Go ahead.”

John’s voice was low and calm. He was looking down at Finch, trying to remember every inch of the man, filling all the regrets of being not able to do so while he was under employment of the man.

“What?”

Finch looked up, sounded confused.

John smiled his charming smile.

“Something you said once.”

John said, while replaying the exact moment in his mind.

“About how sooner or later we’d both probably end up dead.”

Silent filled between the men.

Finch’s expression finally relaxed.

“I’d prefer later.” 

Finch smiled while slightly shaking his head a little.

“After all, I’m the one that got you into this in the first place.”

Seeing the man finally relaxing, John chuckled.

“I’m pretty sure I’d be dead already if you hadn’t found me.”

“It’s hard to say.”

“Not really.”

Because he was going to make sure of it, sure that he would ended it.

Just like he was sure that it’s all his fault that this happened.

He should’ve known better.

John didn’t mind costing his own life saving other people, but he coolant bear the fact that it costed him Finch’s life too.

“Finch, I…”

John hesitated, still debating whether he should be selfish one last time and told Finch everything. 

“Yes?”

But he didn’t deserve him, not even a little bit. He would never be worthy enough of the man who couldn’t stop fighting for what he thought was right.

Anyway, telling him now wouldn’t do any good.

John convinced himself at last.

It’s time.

“Pick a winner, Harold.”

Finch stared at John, and looking down at his phone again. The smile on his face disappeared. He took in a deep breath and started to type in the number but stopped at the last digit. Finch looked up again.

Sorry.

Apologizing silently again, John smiled.

“It’s okay. I’m here with you.” And I will always be from now on.

And Finch keyed in another number.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Things happened  
> a lot of things  
> but I will never bored you with it

**Author's Note:**

> As long as they are together, I'm happy


End file.
